Mom tries to be a realist, but her kids see only a killjoy Carolyn Hax is away. The following first appeared Feb. 24, 2012. Dear Carolyn: From “You’re not getting a puppy” to first loves, how does a parent teach a child to deal with bitter tears and heartbreaking disappointment? I was taught not to get your hopes up. Is that a downer or just being a realist? As a mom of four, I have been accused of “sucking the joy out of everything,” and my response is always that I am just trying to help them temper the disappointments that they suffer and that I am faced with having to deal with afterward. Got any suggestions? — Mom a.k.a. Debbie Downer | 
